Be what you want

In all the random choices you can make, we tend to make all the ones desired by our loved ones. It’s a vicious cycle of desire and needs, be it love or sacrifices, it’s inherently exhausting at times. Yes, the submission to relationships has been amazing in past, and yes it did provide strong family support and sometimes made you feel all-powerful but like Stan Lee wrote “with great power comes great responsibility” – This is something we tend to forget easily.

The whole concept of endless efforts to maintain a relationship does seem fruitless and puts an extreme emotional strain, yet people continuously put those efforts.

I wonder what drives people to continue to succumb to relationships. Is it the fear of losing, real love, moral obligation, or a program that is driving generations? A matrix yeah!

Compared to some cases where relationships are undervalued so easily at times, it does seem that what we have are the necessary evil and a greener valley. But is it necessary?

Of course, we can’t generalize anything but perhaps we can and quote it to free speech.

Thinking a bit more about relationships, what would you really like? I mean it’s not a prepackaged bottle of cold coffee that you can order on the market, it’s more of a homemade cup of tea meant specifically for individuals, where some may need more milk and sugar than others or perhaps some need strong flavor than other. So mostly it is a custom variation tailored to individuals.

But if that is the case, generalizing and putting all of these in norms would be controversial and rather incorrect.

And I believe that is the main problem, considering every relationship is unique so it would need unique tending and subtracting the cycle of desire and need, you may achieve a perfect one. Because in fact love in itself is selfless and if that is the foundation of every relationship, shouldn’t a relationship be selfless and unbounded?

Having said that, in the end, what really matters is what you want and how you want to spend these years of your life if you ask me – it’s ok for a guy and a girl to be just friends, it’s okay not to roll over on every expectation from your parents, its ok not to be fond of your siblings, it’s ok to be in love with multiple people, self or no one, its ok to be divorced, it’s ok to be married, it’s ok to be not wanting kids, it’s ok to have affection for others, it’s ok not to want a career, its ok to want s career and not marriage, it’s ok to be a gym freak, it’s ok to be people, pleaser, it’s ok to be married and have kids but still not love your spouse, it’s ok to adopt kids and be a single mother or father, its ok to be in love and then be out of it, and its ok to be what you want.

Good-Byes

Tags

burdened, concerns, emotional outburst, emotions, experience, feelings, future, goodbyes, hard, interrogator, love, memories, next, nostalgia, present, questions, restrain, soul, suffocation, torture

Good-byes are always hard, no matter how good the journey had been, when it comes to bid good-bye your heart suffers the aches and goes into nostalgia.

The memories doesn’t go easy on you either, though they seem like soft and cute spells of happiness, they torture you like an interrogator. You seem stuck to a point of suffocation, you don’t want to move, not even a slight of motion. Your heart feels burdened just as your eyes and your soul. You just don’t want to say it, you restrain yourself from saying it, however you know it is the right thing to do. But you question yourself “is it?”.

You look into the eyes of your beloved, there is an immense love that you feel in your guts, there is an unsatisfied urge, an unsung song and an incomplete story. You know your heart, you know how badly you want to seize this moment, but you are confused and you think you do not have a choice.

“What will happen next?” your heart worries, it’s always the same, you’ve always been worried about future, about the right and wrong and so you’ve skipped the present.

“Was it worth the silence?” you question again and again.

Good-byes are hard, harder than anything you will ever experience.

Holding On to a Bigger Heart

Where do you start the search of finding the meaning to your life? Is it something you already know or something that you will eventually figure out.  I wonder how we end up dreaming the entire life and not doing anything to grab those dreams and throw them into reality.  But is it true that we don’t do anything, well I am not sure, I guess some people do try harder to get to their dreams. But the important question is that does it really matter, because in the end we all die and take nothing with us.

I don’t believe in life after death, nor I believe in heaven or hell. My belief is straight, that what you do here now, makes all the difference in your life tomorrow if you live to see that.

Holding on to a bigger heart I love everything and everyone around, may be that is a lie but at-least I try to spread love and help others in what ever way I can.

Coming back to the original question, how does it really matter to have your dreams shape up into reality, is it all about the  satisfaction, is it about the pleasure you get off your achievement that you see in others eyes? I am confused about this, how does a dream trimmed and escaped to reality changes anybody’s life?  What difference does it really make other than the stress relief?

I know life is short, I understand that perfectly and that is the only reason that has brought me where I am today, living with guilt of not doing something is not acceptable to me, I honestly believe in better ask forgiveness than permission.

Although. I asked a lot of questions above, I do have a few dreams as well, but unlike anyone else I am not trying to be in the marathon to prove something to someone. Especially not now, gone are the days when that mattered, now living in peace and living the way it counts matters to me. All I really wanna do is to love, live and breathe free, may be that is too much to ask, but that is my price , yes everything has a price.